Cat Physics:

~Law of Cat Inertia~
A cat at rest will tend to remain at rest, unless acted upon by some  
outside force - such as the opening of cat food, or a nearby scurrying 
mouse.

~Law of Cat Motion~
A cat will move in a straight line, unless there is a really good reason to
change direction.

~Law of Cat Magnetism~
All blue blazers and black sweaters attract cat hair in direct proportion 
to the darkness of the fabric.

~Law of Cat Thermodynamics~
Heat flows from a warmer to a cooler body, except in the case of a cat, in
which case all heat flows to the cat.

~Law of Cat Stretching~
A cat will stretch to a distance proportional to the length of the nap just
taken.

~Law of Cat Elongation~
A cat can make his body long enough to reach just about any counter top 
that has anything remotely interesting on it.

~Law of Cat Obstruction~
A cat must lay on the floor in such a position to obstruct the maximum
amount of human foot traffic.

~Law of Dinner Table Attendance~
Cats must attend all meals when anything good is served.

~Law of Rug Configuration~
No rug may remain in its naturally flat state for very long.

~First Law of Energy Conservation~
Cats know that energy can neither be created nor destroyed and will, 
therefore, use as little energy as possible.

~Second Law of Energy Conservation~
Cats also know that energy can only be stored by a lot of napping.

~Law of Refrigerator Observation~
If a cat watches a refrigerator long enough, someone will come along and 
take out something good to eat.

~Law of Random Comfort Seeking~
A cat will always seek, and usually take over, the most comfortable spot in
any given room.

~Law of Bag/Box Occupancy~
All bags and boxes in a given room must contain a cat within the earliest
possible nanosecond.

~Law of Furniture Replacement~
A cat's desire to scratch furniture is directly proportional to the cost of
the furniture.

~Law of Cat Landing~
A cat will always land in the softest place possible; often the mid-section
of an unsuspecting, reclining human.

~Law of Fluid Displacement~
A cat immersed in milk will displace her own volume, minus the amount of
milk consumed.

~Law of Obedience Resistance~
A cat's resistance varies in proportion to a human's desire for her to do
something.

~Law of Cat Disinterest ~
A cat's interest level will vary in inverse proportion to the amount of
effort a human expends in trying to interest him.

~Law of Pill Rejection~
Any pill given to a cat has the potential energy to reach escape velocity.

~Law of Cat Composition~
A cat is composed of Matter + Anti-Matter + It Doesn't Matter.